Tara Brandner
Watch Tara empower hopeful parents and champion legislation on instagram @tarabfertility.
Five sentences about me…
I was born and raised in a town with a population of 850 people. I have seen Lady Gaga in concert four times and even dressed up in a meat dress. I am the first person on both sides of my family to graduate with a masters and doctorate degree. I love snow skiing and outdoor activities. I have worked for five years in the state of ND and federally to mandate insurance coverage for infertility and fertility preservation.
Five sentences about what I've endured in the fertility realm...
After going through a miscarriage early on in our journey I experienced medical gaslighting and have become passionate about speaking up about this topic. During our third round of IUI, I gave my trigger shot with a tornado siren going off. I sought a second opinion and changed clinics before starting IVF. Canceled transfers suck and deserve to be grieved as well as failed embryo transfers. The heaviness of infertility doesn't disappear with a positive pregnancy test or after you have a baby.
One thing I wish I knew going into my fertility journey...
Second opinions early on are so important as well as knowing your clinics success rates. It is easy to get stuck in the flow of comfort but time is so important when going through treatment. Do not be afraid to travel to seek access to high quality reproductive healthcare. Do not be afraid to ask questions and keep asking them until they are answered. Never feel rushed or scared to communicate with your clinic. Your healthcare provider works for you, which means you can hire and fire them aka find a new one at anytime!
One thing about me that is forever changed because of my fertility journey...
My ability to use my voice! I will forever be an advocate for the infertility community but also for speaking up for what I believe in. I am stronger because of this journey and have learned so many tools that have carried over into other hard times of my life.
One funny moment or anecdote from my fertility journey...
My trigger shot for our final IUI was given in our storm cellar due to the tornado siren going off. I new there likely was not an actual tornado as it rarely happens in North Dakota, but I was not going to let anything get in the way of ruining that cycle!
One product, practice, or ritual I adopted during my fertility journey, which I have/have not kept a part of my life...
I continue to use affirmations, meditations, and added hypnotherapy into my weekly practices. I learned that life is hard and we are messy humans. That means life will throw other hard and traumatic events at us. Theses tools I learned during infertility helped me significantly after treatment.