Kelly Armstrong

Watch Kelly empower women on instagram @kellyarmstrongofficial.

Five sentences about me…

Life and Mindset Coach - Founder and CEO of Embrace Your Life. Wife- Married 13years to husband Todd, Mother to our amazing 10 year old boy Jace. Colorado Native. Love spending time in nature and being active in the gym. Journaling and reading my Bible and self development books keep me grounded. Heartset along with Mindset is very important to me and being able to show up as my best self for my family and clients.

Five sentences about what I've endured in the fertility realm...

Unexplained Infertility is a real thing- I didn't know this was even possible. After having one with a very successful pregnancy and birth, I never dreamed we wouldn't be blessed with baby #2 that we wanted so passionately!!

Losing myself scared me! I've never felt so lost and lonely in my life. The toll it takes on you not only physically and financially (because I was prepared for all that) but the emotional and spiritual tol!!

I didn't think anyone could cry as much as I did even when surrounded by family and friends who cared. Every infertility story looks and feels different from the next. Unexplained Infertility is different from a miscarriage, and a miscarriage is different from PCOS, and unexplained infertility is different from Secondary unexplained infertility and so on. They all have their unique challenges and require a different path of emotions---They're not the same when it comes to treatment and def not in recovery of the heartaches that come along with.

Everyone means well---not only do you have your emotions but you have everyone and their mother giving you advice. Have you thought about adoption, well at least you have one- you should be grateful, maybe it's not Gods plan, you're lucky you haven't had a miscarriage. I can't believe you're not getting pregnant, I look at my husband and I get pregnant. You should go on a vacation, get drunk and you'll get pregnant- that's what happened to my sister. and on and on and on ------it's heavy. And no one prepares you for that! Not including my husband in the deep emotional part because I didn't want him to worry. It's hard to talk about sometimes. I thought I was protecting him at times, and wanted to just "fix" it myself because he was doing so much for our family outside the home. Looking back I wish I would have "checked in" with him more. And not just for me, but him too!! How was he feeling through it all? What was he experiencing? How was he processing those 6 1/2 years?

Each failed attempt brought on another month of sadness and disappointment for both of us--- I encourage couples to check in, talk about it, have that alone time to be there for each other and have an honest and sincere conversation with each other. Pray together! Keep connected because this process can break couples---it's stressful!!

One thing I wish I knew going into my fertility journey...

I wish I would have had someone to talk to. I had heard "stories" of how hard the journey could be but until you actually experience it and walk in those shoes, you can't possibly prepare yourself for it. I felt so alone and no one actually knowing what I was going through was the most difficult.

I have said before, I wish at my doctors office they would have prepared me a little bit more and given me a list of people I could contact for support. When things get hard, here is a list of therapists, coaches, women, moms, and support groups you can join. I didn't know of Instagram really and the support that may have been possible there in finding a "coach" or even a "friend" in the trenches!! The doctors seemed so "sure" of success (because nothing was actually wrong science wise or on paper) that I never dreamed of it not happening, we just needed a "little help" to get it going.

The pain that caused was unbearable at times and in time took me down this depression road of loneliness that I honestly didn't' know I was in. I just thought it was part of the "process"

One thing about me that is forever changed because of my fertility journey...

I would Honestly say everything is different!!! A quote that pulled me through was "what if life isn't happening To You, but what if life is happening FOR YOU!!!!' it still gives me the chills to say it out loud. For the longest time I felt like a victim. A victim to this horrible outcome of unexplained secondary infertility. WHY ME??!! Sometimes we like to plan our lives, which has always been my way, but after this season and experience I can now look back and have peace with it and know that Life is Happening For me---- was it fair? NO! Do I fully understand? Not really! Do I wish sometimes it were different? Yes of course but looking back all the dots are now connected---you can't always connect the dots in your life looking forward, only by looking back can you see why you've gone through the things that were given to you in life.

Even though this journey was the most difficult thing I've ever experienced, I have found myself again and she's even brighter and happier then she was before--who knew? God has a way of showing up in your life and showing you the most amazing gifts he's given you if you're ready to receive! Finding my faith again, trusting in him and loving myself was all part of the first steps in healing. Because of that, this experience has led me down a path that was meant exactly for me. You just have to keep taking the next step, then the next step and then the next. Reminding yourself that "You've Got This"!! You are stronger than you think!! Now this journey has led me into "coaching" Coaching and helping other women who have maybe endured the same pain or other life changing events in their life where they look back and say, "wow, how did I get here?" "Where do I go from here" and they are mourning what they thought their life was going to look like. I want to show them the Joy they have inside of themselves, give them the tools to live again with purpose using the pain they've endured----To reimagine what could be!!

One product, practice, or ritual I adopted during my fertility journey, which I have/have not kept a part of my life...

The first step I took in taking my life back after the disappointment that Baby #2 was probably not going to happen for us was I needed a new routine. Before it consisted of taking temperatures, watching what I ate, how much stress I was under, making dr appts, hormone injections all the things. Now what? Who am I now? I don't even recognize who I am now after 6 1/2 years of trying ------ I started listening to uplifting podcasts, reading books, diving into my bible and creating new Morning Routine---just for me. 30-40 min in the early morning before anyone else in the house was awake.

The book "The Miracle Morning" by Hal Elrod was recommend in a podcast I was listening to at the time. It focused on creating that intentional time --- to meditate, create affirmations, read, physical activity etc. and I LOVED IT!!! It gave me something else to focus on plus started my day in a very powerful way. On a positive and life changing note vs ......why is this happening to me? Why our family? Why can't we have a baby? I was inspired to change the way I was feeling on the inside and do the work to pull myself out of the depression that had such a strong hold on my spirt --- I knew that wasn't me and def not who i wanted to be for our son and my family---something had to change